A few of the youth in the church are big fans of
the American TV show, Friends. I watched an episode with one of
the junior high folks a while ago and one of the main characters
explained that her mom had never let her see the endings to sad movies
when she was young. Instead, the mom would turn the movie off
before anything bad happened and tell her daughter that everyone in the
movie lived happily ever after. She grew up, I guess, thinking
that Romeo and Juliet got married and that Charlotte the spider
didn’t die in Charlotte’s web.
During the cold and rain of last month, I was a little bit down and I
started trying this out. I was reading a frustrating story about
violence in the middle east, and I closed the newspaper and made up a
happy ending in which the Israelis and Palestinians got together and
decided to share the Holy Land 50/50 in a sort of Odd-Couple roommate
situation. Then I went to see Blood Diamond, a really sad movie
about the civil war in Sierra Leone. On the way home, I invented
an ending in which the main character woke up and realized that the
entire thing was just a very bad dream. Happy Endings. I
highly recommend this strategy whenever you are down.
Now we all know that real life isn’t full of perfectly happy
endings. Life and people are a lot more complicated than that
– and there are often loose ends and little arguments and
rainstorms and days when the bus is late. Life isn’t
perfect. We can live with that.
But the problem comes when things happen…and suddenly there is
no happy ending in sight. You find yourself in a situation so far
from what you hoped for, so far from where you expected to
be…that you can’t even picture any way out of the mess at
all, much less a happy ending.
Have you had this happen? Have you all of a sudden realized that
things have not turned out the way that you expected? That you
can’t even imagine what to do next?
People tell me that divorce often feels this way. For however
many years, you feel like you have a pretty good sense of what the rest
of your life is going to look like, you have a companion and a daily
routine. And then the future that you’ve imagined, every
stable thing, is gone. And you can’t even begin to know
what to do next.
Did you have this experience in moving to Paris? One day
you’re in line at the prefecture for the 20th time and you
realize that you are frustrated and lonely and sad. At home in
Africa or the Philippines or the States, you pictured France as a kind
of happy ending – comfort, safety, financial security, handsome
men in berets. But all of a sudden, you realize that this is not
the life you’ve pictured, and you have no idea of what to do next.
The death of someone we love, unemployment, the end of a friendship,
illness, miscarriage, depression – all of these and so many more
experiences can mean that life as we know it is all of a sudden
over. And we’re left thinking…what in the world do I
do now?
In our gospel text today describes the evening of the first Easter
Sunday. Jesus’ disciples were gathered together in a room
with the door locked – afraid that the authorities would find
them and crucify them like they did Jesus. I wonder if it was
sort of like a really awkward funeral – everyone wandering around
the room having short, uncomfortable conversations…feeling like
none of what is happening could possibly be real. The disciples
were not enjoying any happy endings– instead, they must have been
filled with that wild-eyed terror that comes when every hope you have
has been destroyed. They were so confused, so desperately sad
that they couldn’t do anything but stare at the locked door, with
absolutely no idea of what might come next.
But Mary Magdalene had already told the disciples that she has seen the
risen Christ. You would think that they would have been
overwhelmed with joy…their friend had risen from the dead, just
as he’d promised. This is a good thing…but yet the
disciples were still in that place where we so often are, where our
hopes for the future, all our expectations and dreams, have been taken
away so suddenly that we’re almost paralyzed.
You see, the disciples were not expecting to be locked in a room in Jerusalem on that particular Sunday.
During Jesus’ lifetime, times were hard in Palestine. If
you read the parables, you get the picture of a time and place where
people are worried about what they will eat and drink and wear.
There’s talk of absentee landlords, of beggars, debt, and
disease. The Romans had taken over Israel before Jesus was
born. And with their rule came increased taxes. And this
money had to come from less and less land as the cities expanded.
Soon there were foreclosures. Families left their own land as
they neared starvation and the men became day laborers, waiting in long
lines for the chance to put in a day’s work in someone
else’s fields.
The disciples were good and faithful Jews. They loved their God
and they loved Israel. They would have been pained by the
suffering of their people. And they would have been raised to
remember King David and the great days of a strong and independent
Jewish nation. Surely they would have yearned for the restoration
of Israel that the prophets predicted.
And then along came Jesus.
When he said that he was the messiah, when he said that he had come to
inaugurate a new kingdom…I think that some of the disciples
might have thought Jesus would be the long awaited successor to David,
the king who would militarily defeat the Romans and establish a
peaceful and just kingdom. This, they said, is the one who will
redeem Israel
Can you imagine their hopes and dreams for the new Israel, the new
earthly kingdom? Their children wouldn’t fear slavery in
the Roman mines or crucifixion for insubordination. No more
starvation, debt, or back-breaking labor. Sure, Jesus had said
some weird things now and then to suggest that his plan might be a
little off, but still…
When Jesus entered Jerusalem at Passover the week before his death, I
think that many of the disciples were thinking – this is
it! This is the moment! Now Jesus is going to reveal
himself as the Messiah and to win freedom that the Jews hadn’t
really tasted for centuries
It would have been a perfect time for a revolution. Jesus was at
the peak of his popularity. And it was the Passover festival, one
of the few times that there were enough Jews in Jerusalem to overwhelm
the empire. Everything has been building to this Passover
week. They sat down to the Passover meal. Jesus, at table
with his friends…about to tell them that God had sent him to be
king and that they get to be a part of the new kingdom.
And this, this was the tragedy, this was the horrible
disappointment: Jesus refused to do it. He stood up from
the table and instead of announcing the beginning of the New Jerusalem
under his kingship, he stripped off his clothes and started washing the
disciples’ feet.
Instead of accepting the responsibility of freeing his people from
oppression – and they’ve seen the miracles and the crowds
– they know he could have done it – Jesus took on the role
of a servant. He took on a role that in the most explicit way
rejects the royal dignity and military power that they wanted him to
take on. .
And then, without putting up a fight, he went to the cross and died.
Can you imagine how devastated they were? Not only had they lost
their friend and leader, but all their plans, the dreams that had led
them to leave their homes, jobs and families…all of their hopes
were buried in a stranger’s tomb.
For three years they had followed Jesus. And now he was
gone. They had no idea where to go, what to do. And so they
just sat there in the locked room, eyes wide with shock and fear,
staring at those four walls.
Have you ever been there? Have you ever had a happy ending
disappear or a dream fall apart? Have you ever sat there, staring
at the wall, wondering what in the world to do next?
There are a lot of things that get me excited about being a
Christian. Free coffee, an excuse to play dodgeball regularly,
and of course the chance to dress in this, my Judge Judy outfit,
once a week …but one of the main ones is this: The Gospel
tells us that when the disciples were in shock and despair, locked in
that room in Jerusalem, Jesus showed up.
We are human beings, and we have our small human hopes and plans.
We tend to think that the only possibilities that exist in life are the
ones that we can dream up on our own and pursue by our own wisdom and
ability. We think that the future depends on our own strength .
If we work hard enough, love enough, plan enough then our plans will
succeed. If somehow we find ourselves with no way of going
forward, with all the roads blocked, then we think the story is
over.
And it’s kind of attractive, this idea that everything is under
our control. But the resurrection is the ultimate NO to this
human delusion. The disciples thought that the Jesus part of the
story was over, that their adventure with him had ended. In human
terms, Jesus’ death meant an end to everything. And yet, in
that locked room with every human hope destroyed, Jesus showed
up.
And this, I think, means that we have to remember that the story
isn’t over when we think it’s over – when we run out
of energy and strength. It isn’t over when we can’t
think of any way to go on, when we can’t see any hope.
In reality, the future is God’s, not ours. The story is
over ONLY when God says that it’s over. When we are in the
depths of despair, when we are confused, when we can’t think of
any possible happy ending that could be ahead for us. Jesus’
presence in that locked room reminds us that God doesn’t work in
the world with the same limits that we do.
Everything is possible for God. Never, never give up looking for
a resurrection when all your hope is dead. Never give up.
When all hope is lost, Jesus shows up.
Now, this doesn’t mean that even when it seems that all hope is
gone, we should stubbornly hold out for what we planned on in the first
place…
Even though Jesus had tried to tell the disciples that he would be
crucified and resurrected, they didn’t get it. Peter and
another disciple saw the empty tomb, but the scripture tells us that
they didn’t even tell the other disciples, they just quietly
returned home. Mary Magdalene had told them outright that Jesus
was risen. But it seems like the disciples couldn’t let go
of their original expectations. They had planned that Jesus would
become the earthly king of Israel. And instead Jesus
died. They weren’t looking for a resurrected Jesus
because they couldn’t get past that dead earthly king.
In order to move into the God’s future – on God’s
terms and not ours, we have to let go of our old expectations. I
don’t know if you’ve ever tried to pry something out of a
toddler’s fingers. Those very small kids have
extraordinarily strong hand muscles and even if you are offering them
their favorite snack or stuffed animal, they absolutely won’t let
go of whatever they’re holding – which is usually something
gross that they’ve found on the ground and want to eat. I
think that this is how we are with God sometimes. He is holding
up possibilities that we’ve never dreamed of and we are holding
on as hard as we can to a piece of old chewing gum. And he slowly
tries to pry our fingers loose, to get us to see that as soon as we
give up our old hopes, we can get in line with God’s will for us
and actually move forward. We have to quit focusing on the grave
where our old hopes are buried and notice that the risen Jesus is in
the room with us.
And we have to realize that we worship the God who died a
criminal’s death, who went to the cross instead of to the throne
of David. This should be fair warning that God’s future
might be very strange. We have to learn that God acts
unpredictably and in accordance with a plan that we don’t
know. This isn’t easy. Even though the disciples
eventually realized the extraordinary miracle of the resurrection, even
though they eventually felt Easter joy, most of them were persecuted
for the rest of their lives.
Jesus will absolutely show up when we are at the end of our rope, when
all our expectations have been disappointed – but this
doesn’t mean that he’ll give us an easy way
out.
It also doesn’t mean that we get to be passive, that whenever we
are disappointed or grieved we can sit back and wait for God to get us
out of whatever situation we are in. When Jesus appeared to the
disciples in the locked room, the first thing he said was, “peace
be with you.” I’d imagine that this was because they
were terrified. He showed them the wounds in his hands and side
so that they would know who he was. And then, just minutes after
arriving, while they are still getting used to the idea that he’s
been resurrected, he says “As the Father has sent me, so I send
you.” In other words, we are called to imitate Jesus in his
service of others.
Jesus is the one who is present with us when all hope is gone, when we
can’t see a way forward, when we are at our lowest moments.
In the same way, we are to show up for each other in those dark times
as well. Jesus is the one who always points us toward God’s
will when we don’t know which way to turn, who makes a way when
it seems like there is no way. In the same way, we must do that
for each other.
We are called to be Christ to each other, to be Christ’s
reassuring presence and love, his helping hands in a time of trouble,
his strong back when someone needs to be carried. We can
encourage each other to let go of our own hopes and expectations so
that we can see where God is calling us. We can be witnesses to
the resurrection, the ones who constantly point to the fact that the
story is not over.
I will never forget one Sunday when I was in seminary. I worked
at a church and I was sitting up front helping to lead. I
remember that I was at the low ebb of my faith. And at this
church they had a healing service – at the end of the service we
would sing old familiar hymns and people could line up to come forward
for prayer, laying on of hands, anointing and so on.
There was a couple in our church, Mary and Ben. Earlier in the
week, Ben’s father had died and Mary and Ben were
devastated. He was really a pillar of strength in that
family. Ben’s mother, the wife of the man who had just
died, was pretty deep into Alzheimers. She kept asking where her
husband was…and so, in the middle of their grief, Ben and Mary
had to keep reminding his wife of fifty years that he was dead.
They had to see her shock and sadness as she heard the news over and
over again. It was horrible. I was actually surprised that
they made it to church that Sunday.
I was even more surprised when I saw them get up to come forward for
healing prayer. I will never forget watching the three of them
come up the aisle. Mary and Ben on either side of Ben’s
mom… They looked ripped open, just raw with grief. All
three of them had this look that said, what in the world do we do now?
And yet they made this slow inching progress up the aisle. At the
beginning, Mary and Ben were holding the older woman up, then it looked
like Mary and Ben were holding each other up too and by the end, all
three were leaning on each other.
My first thought was, good grief, what a hopeless situation.
My second thought was…I have never seen faith like that in my
life. I hadn’t. and I haven’t since. That
is the kind of faith that moves mountains. That is the kind of
faith that turned the world upside down.
That is faith. Faith means that when you have no idea what to do
and there is no human possibility of a happy ending…you leave
your old hopes and expectations behind, grab on to the people you love
and inch slowly and painfully to forward. Mary, Ben and their
mother had no idea what the future might bring, but they had faith that
the future started where Jesus showed up.
